A little mystery

I have something to talk about tonight that has nothing to do with Mothering (go figure)!  It's strange but true - I actually have something happening in my life right now besides children :)

In December we received a couple of really cool packages in the mail.  The first was a parcel - delivered in a cooled box by UPS.  Inside - two wonderfully yummy bricks of cheese.  The sender - Anonymous.  I searched friends and family but no one would admit to sending it.  We thought this was a delightful Secret Santa gesture by some beloved person and enjoyed every morsel by noon the same day! Some friends were concerned about us eating this anonymous food - I thought it was really fun and had no doubt it was safe.

About 3 days after the anonymous cheese another parcel arrived.  This time -two bottles of wine.  Same mode of delivery - no sender.  Once again no one came forward to accept our thanks for this lovely gift.  We counted ourselves very lucky to have such a generous friend in our lives and downed the mystery wine with glee.

Yesterday I arrived home to find a book in my mailbox.  This item was not mailed - it was hand delivered.  It was not wrapped in any way. There is no name, no marking....nothing!  It's clear that the book is not new - but has been handled with care by its previous owner.  That owner being....anonymous.  I find this to be a delightful mystery.  I have NO idea if the book is related to the December gifts.  I  assume that it is but there's no way to be sure. 

So - here's the thing.  When I began reading the book it's based on a young woman who receives several anonymous packages in her mailbox (symmetry).  They pose the questions - "who are you?" and "where does the world come from?"  GULP  I search my mind....who out there in my life knows how these questions have haunted me since I was very very young??  Who - if anyone besides my mother - have I told that I used to sit in the bathtub and wonder if I was real - or just someone else's idea!!?  Could it be - that this is a coincidence?? Who chose this book?  Why did they choose it for me? Why did they decide to put it in my mailbox anonymously?  Did they have any idea what an impact it would have?  Did they even realise the symmetry in the way it was delivered? Was that the point?  Is this the game??  Should I be freaking out?  (because truth be told there's a small voice in the back of my head saying..."creepy Kate - a little wee bit creepy") I have no idea what to make of this!

Maybe someone felt it would be nice to give me a little food for thought.  This blog is about the meaning of life after all....so let's start with the basics.  You can't really discuss the meaning of life until you address these questions?  Who are you?  and Where did the world come from??  So....what do YOU think?

Not long ago I read a book called 'The Untethered Soul' this book discussed the question of self in detail - and I found myself leaning toward the concept that  I am the soul who experiences the experiences.  I would be the same observer no matter who I was born to, what my name was and what experiences I had.  The I, the self is not the living, it's the entity experiencing life.....hmmmmmm.....yep - that's it in a nut shell.

As for where the world began....???? Shoot - I don't know!
Nothing comes of nothing, and yet here we are!  And, as my little Sophie says (The Book is Sophie's World by the way).  Even if God is the answer - God is still not the answer because God had to have a beginning in order to be God!!!  YIKES!!!  Damn Damn Damn....

So here I sit for the first time in a very long time.  I close my eyes and wonder....are we real? 
Am I real or am I someone else's idea? 
AND if I am someone else's idea - who is it? 
AND Where did their world come from??? 
This is exciting, and overwhelming all at once.  Damn you anonymous gift giver!  Damn you!

In addition to the mystery of my existence I am also left trying to figure out who my anonymous gift giver is!  I'm not sure which is more distracting to tell you the truth.  Though I admit maybe I should be a little concerned about it.  I'm not (okay - maybe just enough to double check the door and window locks lol).  Mostly,  I'm thrilled to have something to think about - something of my own.  A new book and some exercise for my brain.

Having said that ....if my secret friend is reading this blog and planning to give me any more books....could you make it something like a Where's Waldo please??  I don't think I can handle much more right now :D

G'Night (if you can sleep with this stuff rolling around in YOUR head!)